My Day

Today I have:

• Watched a girl get hit on by a bus driver.

• Been hit in the bottom with a Ninja Turtle

• Rescued someone from drowning in a ball pit

• Made up several new verses to "The Wheels on the Bus"

• Nearly been attacked by a wasp in the bathroom. OK, theoretically, the wasp was sitting on the window and I was screeching "It's going to kill me! Help! I can't wash my hair, because it's watching me, planning its attack. I hate nature!" But that's still an attack in my book

• Done that weird "Step side to side thing with someone approaching me on the pavement" dance

• Had an in-depth discussion about shocking drink-driving ads whilst feeding stewed apple to a baby.

And you wonder why I feel professionally unfulfilled????