So last night, I went out with some mathematicians. And a guy who studies drama therapy for people who are mentally ill. I don't know his name, but he was from Norway. He had cool hair that kind of loked like dreadlocks, BUT (And this is the amazing part), it wasn't!
>This is a picture of curry. This is not what I ate last night. Gee! This curry has got fish in it. If I ate that, I'd probably die. Or at least puff up most unattractively. Thanks for caring about my health, you idiots.<
Here is what went down:
- 7:00- Meet people on the steps in front of the University. The one other girl (Out of a group of 12 of us!) has been on holiday for three weeks. She immediately notices that I got my hair dyed. I've been living with the MATH 24/7 and he only asked me yesterday "Have you done something different to your hair??"
- 7:20- We wait for the slowcoaches to turn up. Honestly, considering that they're maths dudes, and, oh, I don't know, work with numbers all day they'd be able to figure out what time we're meeting, and get there on time. My cleavage attracts great attention.
- 8:00- I'd forgotten how much fun it can be when 12 people go to an Indian restaurant, and order food. Half of us are non Native-English speakers, and none of us are Native Indian Speakers, so when we order there is a lot of chaos. I order my Chicken Tikka Massala. mmmmmmm. Chicken.
- 8:20- The food arrives, and the poor waiter is yelling out stuff like "Balti Rice with Prawn Korma! I said, BALTI RICE WITH PRAWN KORMA!" Everyone else is still talking maths. Perhaps they won't know if I just accept all their food on their behalf. mmmmm. Balti Rice.
- 8:23- Great confusion as everybody tries to remember what they ordered.
- 8:30-9:00- Eating. Yes, there is a seven-minute gap between getting our food and eating it. I do this for hightened dramatic effect when I write about it in my blog.
- 9:00- I discover my neighbour really enjoyed the "Unbearable Lightness of Being". I direct him to talk to the MATH. They're so smart.
- 9:05- Twiddle my fork.
- 9:06- Drop my fork.
- 9:07- Discover that among guys it is entirely legitimate to fill in a coversational gap with the phrase "So, Fred, what do you think is the Opimum breast size?"
- 9:10-9:20- Debate about porn.
- 9:20- Figure out how to split the bill. For God's sake, these people are maths dudes! I pay seven pounds. In coins. Because my wallet is really heavy with coins in it.
- 9:30- Pub. Drink much. Realise that there is no joke in such bad taste that men will not a) Laugh at it. b) Tell it. Spend most of the night shifting my seats as to get away from the majority of the smokers. Ask everyone about Prague. Nobody's been to Prague, but apparantly it's quite good. It better live up to expectations, otherwise I will be mad. Go to toilet. Oooh, toilet is carpeted! I find this a weird English habit. You know when you go to visit somebody's house, and their bathroom is carpeted, and it just feels a little bit odd? Well, that's how I feel. Odd. Am also possibly drunk. Go on an ultimately futile search for toilet paper.
- 12:30- Thanks to licencing laws, the pub is now shut, and we are still sitting outside it. Somebody suggests lying in a gutter. Quite possibly this is my suggestion.
- 12:35- Riddles. Now we have to tell riddles. And not the sort of "A man is walking across a field in Springtime. He comes across 2 lumps of coal and a carrot. Why are they there?" riddles. No, these are hard Maths-type riddles, and I don't care how many pills you have to cut in half in order not to die. Even the people who don't speak English very well understand more about this riddle than me.
- 1:30- Fall asleep.
All in all, it was a fun night. I don't know how to end this entry. So I'm just going to stop.
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